Quote for the day

Solace has a price in life, in our solitude, but can we trade our solitude for long? not plausible, this is a crowded world after all.

Quote for the day

The grass is always greener on the other side, for the alive, and the dead..

Quote for the day

In the a very dark night, I look up to the sky and wonder, what am I to say of this life, when a flimsy candle beholds a flickering flame, a flimsy life beholds a flickering mind, a flimsy sky beholds one to many flickering stars. Is there something to being flimsy? May be, as no matter how beastly man can be, he still needs a mother to borne him, out here. Well is this, after all the actual form of justice, to give the weak the reign over the strong. I fear, as i look into this democracy and religious doctrines. 

Ni8 dweller-17-jun-2011

Dance may perhaps be the first vice we ever learnt, it's from there we learned how to loose our-self first..

Introspection: The Truth, the play of Smirk, Cry and Dogmas.

Play 1: The Smirk

Why the Smirk? For no eyes can evereven Lie, forget the Smirk…

After a Plain day, Winding up myself before the Mirror, with those everlasting eyes, I wonder... What's in a Mirror, that makes us go naked in Truth, Is it the very frame of watching Our-Self, err the Heart in a Humane Form, or of our Inner Narcissisty, to boast to our Self of our Sins, either way, it is more Powerful than a Lawyer or a Priest, who harp on Good and Fear in our Courts and Churches to knuckle out the Truth from us, for Righteousness. Hooking and getting deeper into those eyes, I see Fear that rattle us there and Ego that propels us here. Complete absence or presence of Power brings the Truth within us. So, is it all about Power and if so am I having it now, enough to quench my desire?! et tu, mes yeux?! What about you?! What do you need?!

Seule la vérité,

ma beauté

Seule la vérité

(Only the Truth,

My beauty

Only the Truth)

for

"Beauty is truth, truth beauty," - that is all

ye know on earth, and all ye need to know. (John Keats)

The more the presence or absence of power, the more truthful one becomes of one's self. The more truthful one is the more beautiful...

No later than I realized this, the lips goes for a curve and the cheeks try a trough, in short he smirks, as I frown. No matter how many times I splash the water on this face, the smirks as a stain refuses to leave my face. One can take a face out of a smirk but never a smirk out of the face, like the acts of Men on this earth, they are borne out of it, never to be parted again. So are WE, aren’t We?! born out for Life, borne with scars of our birth never to be parted again, aren’t we?!

Those Eyes, they glowed, the smirk I would say rather, on the utterance of this truth or rather a fact. These Eyes they have a language of their own, Language of the truth, the beauty, that our Lips can never express, For no eyes can ever lie, they thrive in the presence or absence of, power like truth, as truth is all they need, to smirk & glow or dim forever.

Over the years the Smirk have come to define us, and we anoint Moments that make our Life, with these Smirks, Thou Initially we may harp on a Cry as a revelation in these Moments, as an Life affirming act, which Well was our first Act of us as Humans out here, forgot not that no Great acts of Men has ever been complete without their Smirks, the Last final Act and so should our Life be, Oh!! How I wish, wish to have One, when I die, but not before the Tears flow through the dimples of my cheeks… but till then I will have to wait… et tu, mes yeux?! what about you?! what do you need?! A tear or a cheer or both rather?!

They also serve who only stand and wait... (John Milton)

May be ‘U’ are right, I may have to wait till my last shot of breath, to know. Till then I may have to run through the various interludes the Life will offer Me. Just like a Rain, that’s raining outside, these interludes might bring in a lot of fragrance from deep within. Let’s see what the day may hold for me further, as WE interlude with it.

Play 2: The Cry

Why the Cry? For no Lips can evereven feel Pain, forget the Tears…

The Rain, the Lagniappe, Nature has left for us, irrespective of the plundering we did with it. These speck of drops, when ricocheting back from earth brings out the fragrance from deep within, with a roar of the Thunder. The Tale is repeated elsewhere with us and within us too, through our Tears coupled the Cry, the very first act of us, brings out the yelp, the life within. The Life that comes with this roar from within, goes off with the roar from outside, in the Life we left on earth.

These Tears, Our Cries, make Our Journey, and completes, Oh, forget about its completion, it will never even starts without it. It comes with a Sense of Poignancy and so Our Pathos are defined with Cries, where as Our Ethos, are made up with Our Smirks. et tu, mes yeux?! What about you?! What are you made up of?

Jamais souhaitent apprendre cette vérité

(Never Wish to learn this Truth)

For,

"…Where ignorance is bliss,

'tis folly to be Wise." (Thomas Gray)

Why? Why you say this? Why now? Is it Vice to be Wise? I can’t ignore those Sparkles again in their eyes. They nod in union on the utterance of this truth that the Greater the Ignorance the Longer the Bliss be, up until you it.

Looking back, Our Childhood, the Age of Innocence, was actually an Age for Ignorance, and is still the only single moment that we all wish we traverse back in time, for then the ephemeral bliss looked like for eternal, and since then we lay emphasis on ignorance for in need of this ephemeral bliss and keeping us under the hood of dogmas, religions, gods, democracy, even the system, and everything including our very way of life, living and seeing.

Truth is no bliss, and so we discarded it long back. Cry is no bliss and so we try discarding it too, from our face, but little do we know, that it can’t be, and

"Perhaps I know best why it is man alone who laughs; he alone suffers so deeply that he had to invent laughter." (Friedrich Nietzsche)

To Cry, is to be Truthful, & so we Cry before God, Law et all, but before whom are we all crying, if not the Truth, which is Our Reality, and not the Our Ignorance, and definitely not the dogmas that tried filling in its place, and so there is Pain in our Confession, not cheer.

Play 3: Our Dogmas

As the Trees are, in our Landscape the dogmas are spread over our vivid Thoughts, for most of our Lives we struggle over with them, not able to comprehend, what they are, why they should be, but they are as those trees, an inevitable part of any landscape.

They are in, as Our Gods, Laws, Societies and in us, in our need for Morals, Goals, Ambitions and Dreams. They are everywhere but nowhere.

Why do we need Goals? Why a God or Morals? Why to be right in being right?

Why it’s a right to be right? and why not right to be right?

et tu, mes yeux?! What do you see in it all?

The Most real called Life being defined and put @ stake by the Most unreal called Dogmas?!

Answer me!!


<Will wind up soon>..

Chapter 3: Memoirs of a day - Evening

Chapter 3: Memoirs of a day - Evening 


I always look up to the evening break. That's the time I get to see Garv, a stoic hard core programmer struggling us ordinary, don't know why he is enacting this part. Didn't ask.


Our conversations always have fiery flair, so much so that I often tout it as a glowing beacon giving me, my solace as I drudge through these dark  days, but at times we do have one of those fiery flairs, that burns out of our hands which neither of us wished had started, but now having started it, neither of us wanted to end up in the wrong side. What's the topic? Well, it's about life. Didn't live worthy to defend or offend life but still when asked 'What is life?'


'To be lived' I replied.


'Decides who?' He prompted immediately.


'Decides who? Well, it's our own Self.' I asserted.


'Forget Self Stick to life', he grunted.


I chuckled back saying 'There isn't one without the Other'


Then there was this sparkle in those eyes. Well the tiger is out of it's lair now, Well that's it. There will be no handshakes this evening.


He looked into my eyes, smirking while asking 'If life is to be lived why bother chasing Values?'


I wasn't prepared for that so I preferred to prod him further. 'Well get to the point' I replied.


'Life has no meaning, no value. So it is for the ones who lead life. We all try in our desperation to beget some meaning by some value, so we say live dream desire have passion compassion because in truth life as it is nothing'.


'So Seriously, I don't see a need in living or dying or having any ambitions or emotions, there ain't a point, maybe that's the point, the essence in living or leading life can be summed up as a need to be needed, else there is no life to be lived or lead'.


'If that ain't absurd there is more, in one's dreams, goals, ambitions, that's the stupidity of chasing, but if not for the feelings we get from these, all these absurdities or stupidities or what ever you intended to call would have met their casual end, long ago... if not for these feeling... the basis for all these absurdities'.


But what are these feelings, without our senses & their perceptions, the one at Peace forever, but then we may not know its worth, do we?! thou now knowing it all, can we be really be at peace? Apart from death thou...


They are all, Sinister. All those defenders of life & these feelings. In fact they are its abusers too... But then I need a life to explain the absurdity of life... Well ain't that a farce... But then, those who made good with their ambitions et all, they never complain, they never cringe, the losers do, like me here today. But stand apart & look into all, our cringing is stupid just like their need to hunt their ambitions. Well ain't that a farce again'.


'This farce, our life is like a musical chair. We all run around it to the tunes, of our fate. Never be able to hold the seat which we had, when it all started. The music swoons by the hands of fate. If you look closer you will see that the only one who can assure you of any place, in here is the one with force'. This my friend is life. It’s value and its purpose. He stopped, having made his point.


'You do what you ought to do in life, Garv... You don't need to Justify, you don't need to be Romantic, when you love you do because you are able to, that's life'.


'Are you doing?' Came back his reply. 'Are you doing? tell me. If not why defend & If yes why offend by the Way you live?'


'Bro, Life as it is, is for yielding'. I finally let it out, thou not sure. I continued 'For there can be no true victory without yielding. Without life & its yielding there is no value around. Life like nature or our Mother, yields so others can have a value. It lays itself open to be used, abused, utilized & taken, so others can find a value for themselves. Like nature, like a mother life never regrets what it gives. In this it is fair. Hence sacrifice is touted as a great ideal in here, as in sacrifice we see nature, we see our mother, & in a way it truly represents life as it is & hence the sacrificer is touted as great. Your life has made it's sacrifice so that you may question it today. There is none that exist without a meaning or a value in here. Every single thing has some if only you look closer. This is life, it's use & what becomes it's purpose is a chance for the Will on our Mind to realize it's potent'.


'So you mean to say life yielded it's self for you, Ajay?'. He was abrasive.


I continued. 'Life doesn't have a Self or a Sense, but as long as it is there it will yield itself to what you do. It is in this sense it behaves like a caring mother or resourceful nature, without expecting any from our end, yielding their all for our better. In this sense I compare life to the senses of nature or our mother. In every sense life is the mother of will, in us'.


I quit at that point with a wry smile wrapped around my lips. 'That's it for the evening'. I said. ' Perhaps some other day some other time, we be able to see what it is beyond the limits of our view points, but today it's got to hang in here. Right here right now.'


'That's it for the day?! That's it after all that boasting on life?  Don't want to listen again to any more of my grunts?'


He roared with a laughter which kept coming at me, across the floor as I walked away.


Perhaps we crossed our lines today, more than once. It will never be the same between as from now on. In a way it's good.


I could hear his roar, after long.